One of the hardest virtues of all to practice when one has been hurt by divorce, or emotionally abused, insulted or offended by one so close to them. This semi-conscious tendency to see that harboring revenge is a win/lose proposition, and that there comes a time to let go of resentment, indignation or anger is the only way to thrive in the real world of mistakes that people make, including ourselves. We all have limited resources to make use of in pursuing our life’s goals together (or apart), and with that in mind, we cannot afford to harbor negative spending of our energy on the selfishness of seeking the gratification of revenge. We need to let go of the need for retribution or restitution so that we can reinvest our psychological resources either in the relationship, or in ourselves. Ask anyone who has ever gone to court how they feel about the time, energy and money they have spent in fighting an ex, versus what they could have done with all that value.

GO BACK TO MATURE DEFENSE MECHANISMS.