Commonality of Intelligence

Keep in mind that when we refer to intellectual style" in Romantic Dynamics, that has to do with how we process data in the form of analytical, historical, "left-brained" information versus creative, artistic, future-oriented, "right-brained" information. Intelligence is something a bit different. Whether left-brained, or right-brained, or hopefully both as a "style" of the intellect, intelligence in our model refers more to the sheer amount, efficiency, and fire-power" of both of the styles of intellect. Which may depend on a balance of both left- and right-brained processing, and the AMOUNT of power in both. It's how smart you are, as in IQ. And the highest IQ will have both left- and right-brained processing.

It is a good thing when two personality styles get together and give even more intellectual "fire-power" to get to goals. Like a "left-brained" pilot and a "right-brained" pilot, the partners may work together to get to a goal by taking up the slack in the intellectual skill the other lacks. When the left-brained person gets too "tunnel visioned" the right-brained person loosens them up to see more adaptive possibilities. When the right-brained person gets too lost in their big vision at the cost of the fine details, the left-brain person focuses them down to what we need to do in today's bullet-point list.

However, you have likely encountered many times when there has been a great mismatch between the sheer "size" of a partner's left-brain or right-brain - much larger or smaller than your own. This tends to cause one of the partners to have to rely too heavily on the other to have them both reach success, to the resentment of the one doing more intellectual work. It also can feel to them to be a kind of "cultural difference" that carries beliefs and goals not at all matching each other, and in an almost "language I can't comprehend," when one partner is far smarter than the other.

It is then good to assure you have picked a partner of opposite style of intellect - a King or Queen with a Magician or a Lover with a Warrior - but you also need to make sure that you have picked a mate of similar sheer intelligence on the whole.